Toolbox24
Just a quick update, the next review will be the classic Super Mario Kart for the Super Nintendo. Mario Kart Double Dash, and Mario Kart Wii can bow down to the original, and greatest in the series.
Coming soon...
Monday, 6 December 2010
Sunday, 3 October 2010
Toolbox24
Below is a trailer for the new DLC for Left 4 Dead AND Left 4 Dead 2. This is so gamers who only have 1 of the 2 games can enjoy its creamy goodness. Also if you get it for L4D2 it also comes with the No Mercy campaign from the 1st installment. This DLC is out on Tuesday 5th October, and looks to be a tasty edition.
Enjoy.
Below is a trailer for the new DLC for Left 4 Dead AND Left 4 Dead 2. This is so gamers who only have 1 of the 2 games can enjoy its creamy goodness. Also if you get it for L4D2 it also comes with the No Mercy campaign from the 1st installment. This DLC is out on Tuesday 5th October, and looks to be a tasty edition.
Enjoy.
Saturday, 4 September 2010
MonkeyBoxGaming - Review Policy
Toolbox24
Just so you are aware, all the games that I will review on here will be 4 or 5 out of 5. This is because I love gaming, and I loves the games I love, whereas I hate the games I hate.
For now, and the foreseeable future, I will review games from my point of view and they will all be games I like. Unless I find myself having played a game that is such crap I have to let people know in order to avoid it like the plague.
Just in case you thought, "Hey, that Toolbox24 fella, he reviews all his games as like 4 or 5 out of 5...that's stupid!". No worries though...anyways I might do a day in the life of a games character next....just wondering which one...
NOTE - Having a change of heart. Yes I will review games I think to be poor. However these will be a lot shorter - since i have no desire to play or write a review on a game i think is shit. :) Toolbox24
Just so you are aware, all the games that I will review on here will be 4 or 5 out of 5. This is because I love gaming, and I loves the games I love, whereas I hate the games I hate.
For now, and the foreseeable future, I will review games from my point of view and they will all be games I like. Unless I find myself having played a game that is such crap I have to let people know in order to avoid it like the plague.
Just in case you thought, "Hey, that Toolbox24 fella, he reviews all his games as like 4 or 5 out of 5...that's stupid!". No worries though...anyways I might do a day in the life of a games character next....just wondering which one...
NOTE - Having a change of heart. Yes I will review games I think to be poor. However these will be a lot shorter - since i have no desire to play or write a review on a game i think is shit. :) Toolbox24
MonkeyBoxGaming Poem
Carriecakes
Monkeyboxgaming, A site you must see,
reviewing of games
and a chuckle or three
written by genius
...of epic proportions,
They write of the games
and of gaming extortions.
My dearest Toolbox, and Monkey-boy Steve
their gaming know-how you
just would not believe!
Their cleverness now we shall put aside &
their talent so large theres no way it would hide
the way that they'll both draw you into the blog,
would work on most humans, mayhaps cat and dog.
Did you like to play on computers of old?
of amstrad and spectrums, sadly no longer sold.
those games where the characters
were hard to make out
pixleated adventures that would make us all shout!
typing instructions on those games of old,
loved at the time and
still treated like gold!
Or do you play games that leave you frustrated,
that make you feel though the makers
should all be castrated?
no matter your quibble, your angst, big or small
Our Monkeyboxgaming
will go through them all
with the finest of toothcombs and
quickest of wit
they'll tell you what games are good
or are sh....not very good :-)
So please visit their web-site, for 'tis undiscovered
treasure
& read wot they've writ
with distaste or with pleasure!
Monkeyboxgaming, A site you must see,
reviewing of games
and a chuckle or three
written by genius
...of epic proportions,
They write of the games
and of gaming extortions.
My dearest Toolbox, and Monkey-boy Steve
their gaming know-how you
just would not believe!
Their cleverness now we shall put aside &
their talent so large theres no way it would hide
the way that they'll both draw you into the blog,
would work on most humans, mayhaps cat and dog.
Did you like to play on computers of old?
of amstrad and spectrums, sadly no longer sold.
those games where the characters
were hard to make out
pixleated adventures that would make us all shout!
typing instructions on those games of old,
loved at the time and
still treated like gold!
Or do you play games that leave you frustrated,
that make you feel though the makers
should all be castrated?
no matter your quibble, your angst, big or small
Our Monkeyboxgaming
will go through them all
with the finest of toothcombs and
quickest of wit
they'll tell you what games are good
or are sh....not very good :-)
So please visit their web-site, for 'tis undiscovered
treasure
& read wot they've writ
with distaste or with pleasure!
Castles II: Siege and Conquest Review
Castles II: Siege and Conquest
PC/Amiga – Real Time Strategy
Toolbox24
Castles II: Siege and Conquest – which from now will just be C2S&C – is a brilliant game. Unfortunately due to the crapness of the screen recording software I downloaded, videos won’t be available just yet. But hopefully soon.
C2S&C really doesn’t take long to play from start to finish – however takes ages to master to the point that you win the game. Ages. Absolutely ages. Reading on some forums online people have been playing it on and on and on without winning. On easy.
That’s right, on easy this is one mother fucker of a game. Compared to Hard though, easy is a piece of piss. But anyway, we start the game by watching the opening video, a tale that King Charles of Bretagne is dead. Dead without an heir. Oh bollocks. That means that the King must be chosen by the Pope, but not just any old Pierre, Francois or Jacques, oh no, this guy must show that he is ruthless, cunning, a man of the people, among other things. Oh yeah, and he must be able to build some mother funking castles baby. That’s just how the Pope rolls.
Basically the object of the game is to become King. Duh. However you can only become King by having enough sway to do so. In other words you need a score of 7000+ to claim the throne. Obviously.
Hang on, I’m jumping ahead of myself. C2S&C is a brilliant game. It would have to be to attain a review on the prestigious MonkeyBoxGaming website. And as I sit here, munching on my 09:39 Babybel and sipping my lovely coffee, I think to myself, where the fudgesticks to I start?
I’ll start where you’ll start, and walk you through the wonders of C2S&C
The erm, useful…inventory and unit bar!
In the screenshot above, you can see 3 sections. Since I’ve already mentioned the resources, I’ll point them out first. They’re the 4 piccies to the right, that look like a loaf of bread, a tree, a pick axe and bars of gold. You need to keep an eye on those, since you’ll need to keep plenty of them to succeed.
The middle pics are of a shield, an arrow and a helmet. The shield is your infantry, the arrow signifies your archers and the helmet shows your knights, again you need to keep plenty of these to hand!
On the right is the task manager I suppose. They are split into Admin, Military and Political. The bottom number shows the total amount of…erm units that can process each task, and the top number shows the amount free. These will go up as you expand.
The admin slot is where you gather your resources and build your castles, the military slot is where you attack or sabotage your enemies, build units or police your realm to prevent spies or saboteurs from damaging you, and the political slot is where you scout, spy, send diplomats, go to the council and increase your peoples happiness. Aww.
As I say though, the idea is to become king. To do this, you need to fight. And fight lots. If not you’re chosen family is gonna die. The fighting takes place on a separate little mini game, although there isn’t a lot to it. If you’re attacking somewhere your units double (except knights) and if you’re defending, your units half – this is good so that if your units all get killed you’ve still got a force to mount a counter attack!
Your little blue guys killed the little red guys! YEAH!!!
In combat you are always blue. The enemy always red. Again simple, but you know where you stand. You take over different territories and kick some bum this way. The screen where you build a castle is also like this, but with no people just a landscape, and your outline of a castle – as I say you could build your own castle or build a template one based on a real castle.
This castle design is based on Harlech Castle.
The points a castle has shows how strong it is. If it’s a strong castle it’ll keep the territories around it feeling safe and they wont revolt and leave you. If it’s a small little castle, then it’ll only keep itself safe from revolt.
Your castle, your strong hold, where you oversee your troops and from where you command your legions. Wanna see it?
You. In all your Kingly Glory.
When a visitor or messenger comes along to give you some news – start a subplot – then you’ll either see the above giant empty throne room or a massive dining hall with you at the head. Then you see your messenger.
Scarface’s great-great great- great- great- great- great- great- great- great- great- great- great- great- great-….you get the idea.
Wow! A real knight in your court, who sounds a bit like John Cleese but isn’t. Apart from when you say to him to send Arinseault a gift, when his voice goes from quite a posh-ish voice, to a more squeaky, squirmy voice when he says “It shall be done.”
These little subplots affect the outcome of the game still though, for example the demagogue Arinseault, with the mob at his beck and call. Depending on what you do, he either goes missing because he’s accused of murder or he comes to see you with his followers. If he comes to see you, he asks you a few questions, to determine if you should be king. If you pass, you get his blessing and some points on your score, if you fail he does not bless you, and you lose points.
There are also subplots involving a dark secret society, sick villagers, a disgruntled ex-Queen, a piece of sacred land and a traveller who claims to know where Atlantis is – to name but a few.
Despite these interesting subplots, the main game is still a difficult bitch to tame. It is still so hard it makes you think it’s been staring at nudey snaps of Des Lynam.
Some of the other parts of the game are very fun as well, such as sending spies, only to find out that your spy has fallen in love with your enemies niece and abandoned you, or when you receive diplomats, who you can improve relations of your neighbours with or kill. And of course the Pope likes nipping in to take you for as much gold as you can give! “The Pope is willing to grant you an indulgence…for 4 gold!” Yeah well stuff off Popey! I’m not Catholic!!
But basically it’s a game where you need to keep your friends close, and you enemies…well dead. You need to make sure you build a fair few castles, and that you keep your people happy. Don’t behead the Popes diplomat, and woo the demagogue, Arinseault. Be tactical, don’t just barge in. Plan your game as much as you can, but most of all, have fun!! This is an old but amazing game that can have you hooked for hours on end much like Civilization II, Football Manager, Mass Effect and Grand Theft Auto. It is a revelation, it is a great starter for the 90’s so far as games go. It’s got actual voice actors telling you things, and a real-time engine that really makes you wonder what is going on with the other barons and counts. Remember that this game is almost 20 years old, but that doesn’t matter! It’s gameplay, in game music (midi music but so catchy and listenable!), it’s storyline and subplots are all absolutely amazing, and make C2S&C one of the best games of the 1990’s. When you think it’s in the same decade as Half-Life, Doom, Sam n Max, Monkey Island, Jedi Knight, Sim City and others like it, you know it must be a great game. Oh by the way, if you do fuck up, and I know you will. You’ll most likely be treated to what is displayed below.
PC/Amiga – Real Time Strategy
Toolbox24
Castles II: Siege and Conquest – which from now will just be C2S&C – is a brilliant game. Unfortunately due to the crapness of the screen recording software I downloaded, videos won’t be available just yet. But hopefully soon.
C2S&C really doesn’t take long to play from start to finish – however takes ages to master to the point that you win the game. Ages. Absolutely ages. Reading on some forums online people have been playing it on and on and on without winning. On easy.
That’s right, on easy this is one mother fucker of a game. Compared to Hard though, easy is a piece of piss. But anyway, we start the game by watching the opening video, a tale that King Charles of Bretagne is dead. Dead without an heir. Oh bollocks. That means that the King must be chosen by the Pope, but not just any old Pierre, Francois or Jacques, oh no, this guy must show that he is ruthless, cunning, a man of the people, among other things. Oh yeah, and he must be able to build some mother funking castles baby. That’s just how the Pope rolls.
Basically the object of the game is to become King. Duh. However you can only become King by having enough sway to do so. In other words you need a score of 7000+ to claim the throne. Obviously.
Hang on, I’m jumping ahead of myself. C2S&C is a brilliant game. It would have to be to attain a review on the prestigious MonkeyBoxGaming website. And as I sit here, munching on my 09:39 Babybel and sipping my lovely coffee, I think to myself, where the fudgesticks to I start?
I’ll start where you’ll start, and walk you through the wonders of C2S&C
The Castles II main menu. Where the magic…begins.
On C2S&C there are a few different options:
• Reference Videos – a historian guides you through the aspects of real life Castles. Even the guardarobe – the Constables Toilet. Apparently, to attack a castle, some poor gimp would be made to wriggle up the toilet through crap and wee, and then walk through the castle to open the gate, letting in his army.
• Designs – Castle designs, each castle design is based on an actual castle, such as Caerphilly, Harlech, Windsor and even the Tower of London (called the White Tower).
• Tutorial – to help those in need of help. • Game – the actual mother funking game itself.
Classic. The historian wafting around at the thought of someone crawling up the shitter.
I’m going to go ahead and explain a little bit more on the great game itself. It is a RTS, which could well have had some hand in influencing a lot of more recent games – lets remember, C2C&S was made in 1992. 18 years ago at the time of writing. But it was a RTS, with real video references, audio tutorial, cutscenes (of a sort), a plot, mini-games (combat and castle building), and resource management. This is a game that is almost 20 years old, when the most sophisticated games involved Italian plumbers, hedgehogs or a crazed POW killing every Nazi in sight! (no guesses to the 3 game refs…)
Very advanced for it’s time, very playable, even to the fact that since being suggested as a review, I’ve loved playing it. I’ve preferred playing it to the Command and Conquer 1st Decade box set that I bought a couple of weeks ago.
This game is readily downloadable online, but it’s a DOS game, and requires DOSBox or other similar software to play, and you still need to pay to play this, I paid the sum of $5.99 to download this, and it was worth every cent. (American website, GOG.com, also includes Castles I).
Anyways onto the game. As mentioned previously, King Charles of Bretagne (France to you and me) is dead. Dead without an heir in the year 1311. The news spreads as quickly as a plague. To quote from the games intro anyway, and you, yes YOU, get to be one of 5 nobles of Bretagne. Choosing between:
• Aragon – Light Blue – South West
• Albion – Purple – North West
• Anjou – Dark Blue - West
• Burgundy – Brown – South East
• Duke of Valois –Red – North East
The main game screen of Castles II.
There were no distinct advantages or disadvantages of playing as any of the 5 families, apart from playing as Anjou, because you don’t have a corner, you cannot cut off un-captured territories like the other 4 families, which was a distinct advantage of being in one of the 4 corners.
There is also 1 more player, which is always the computer. The Pope. He is yellow on the game, and like the above screenshot has a little icon like the purple one, but it’s yellow and almost always got a Castle on it. The Pope as I say is the guy who will announce who is King at the end of the game. Unless you opt for the much harder strategy of taking everyone over – pope included. Then you get named king by the Anti-Pope – apparently. I’ve never done this, because it really is just too darned hard.
Of course, you could look at it this way, you’ve only lost, if you’ve gone and gotten killed. If you go through the game, but stay chummy with a bigger player – if they’ll let you, then if they become King, you could be one of his trusted allies in the epilogue. Obviously, it’s not King, but it’s not a chopping block either.
You may have looked at the screenshot and thought, “Hmm, what the chuff is the big “I” for?”
Well Timmy I’ll tell you shall I? Each territory has a letter. That letter will be F, G, I or T. These signify whether you can gather Food, Gold, Iron or Timber! Clever eh? No, not really. But delightfully simple. So simple that it doesn’t take long to realise this, and know that to win, you’re gonna need ample amount of all 4 – mostly Gold and Food.
Food is obviously a very good way of feeding your troops, also helping in a couple of side plots which come along in the form of a guy or a gal or a knight coming up and chatting with you. It’s also essential to feed the builders who will build your mighty Castle and is used when building a knight unit my liege.
Gold is the daddy, lots of gold means lots of good! Again simple, but effective. You need gold to pay your troops, create your troops, pay spies and diplomats, build castles, forge alliances, effectively complete side-quests, and build things like knights, ballista’s, catapults and siege towers, police the realm and also – keep the people happy!
Iron is again essential for castle building, but also for building infantry, knights and siege weapons like catapults and siege towers. Timber is the same, but used in the creation of Archers and the siege weapons like catapults and siege towers.
Also if you find yourself in abundance of timber say, but no gold, then you can send a merchant to neighbours to trade or dabble in the black market. I never bother, I just find territories that have them and take them.
On C2S&C there are a few different options:
• Reference Videos – a historian guides you through the aspects of real life Castles. Even the guardarobe – the Constables Toilet. Apparently, to attack a castle, some poor gimp would be made to wriggle up the toilet through crap and wee, and then walk through the castle to open the gate, letting in his army.
• Designs – Castle designs, each castle design is based on an actual castle, such as Caerphilly, Harlech, Windsor and even the Tower of London (called the White Tower).
• Tutorial – to help those in need of help. • Game – the actual mother funking game itself.
Classic. The historian wafting around at the thought of someone crawling up the shitter.
I’m going to go ahead and explain a little bit more on the great game itself. It is a RTS, which could well have had some hand in influencing a lot of more recent games – lets remember, C2C&S was made in 1992. 18 years ago at the time of writing. But it was a RTS, with real video references, audio tutorial, cutscenes (of a sort), a plot, mini-games (combat and castle building), and resource management. This is a game that is almost 20 years old, when the most sophisticated games involved Italian plumbers, hedgehogs or a crazed POW killing every Nazi in sight! (no guesses to the 3 game refs…)
Very advanced for it’s time, very playable, even to the fact that since being suggested as a review, I’ve loved playing it. I’ve preferred playing it to the Command and Conquer 1st Decade box set that I bought a couple of weeks ago.
This game is readily downloadable online, but it’s a DOS game, and requires DOSBox or other similar software to play, and you still need to pay to play this, I paid the sum of $5.99 to download this, and it was worth every cent. (American website, GOG.com, also includes Castles I).
Anyways onto the game. As mentioned previously, King Charles of Bretagne (France to you and me) is dead. Dead without an heir in the year 1311. The news spreads as quickly as a plague. To quote from the games intro anyway, and you, yes YOU, get to be one of 5 nobles of Bretagne. Choosing between:
• Aragon – Light Blue – South West
• Albion – Purple – North West
• Anjou – Dark Blue - West
• Burgundy – Brown – South East
• Duke of Valois –Red – North East
The main game screen of Castles II.
There were no distinct advantages or disadvantages of playing as any of the 5 families, apart from playing as Anjou, because you don’t have a corner, you cannot cut off un-captured territories like the other 4 families, which was a distinct advantage of being in one of the 4 corners.
There is also 1 more player, which is always the computer. The Pope. He is yellow on the game, and like the above screenshot has a little icon like the purple one, but it’s yellow and almost always got a Castle on it. The Pope as I say is the guy who will announce who is King at the end of the game. Unless you opt for the much harder strategy of taking everyone over – pope included. Then you get named king by the Anti-Pope – apparently. I’ve never done this, because it really is just too darned hard.
Of course, you could look at it this way, you’ve only lost, if you’ve gone and gotten killed. If you go through the game, but stay chummy with a bigger player – if they’ll let you, then if they become King, you could be one of his trusted allies in the epilogue. Obviously, it’s not King, but it’s not a chopping block either.
You may have looked at the screenshot and thought, “Hmm, what the chuff is the big “I” for?”
Well Timmy I’ll tell you shall I? Each territory has a letter. That letter will be F, G, I or T. These signify whether you can gather Food, Gold, Iron or Timber! Clever eh? No, not really. But delightfully simple. So simple that it doesn’t take long to realise this, and know that to win, you’re gonna need ample amount of all 4 – mostly Gold and Food.
Food is obviously a very good way of feeding your troops, also helping in a couple of side plots which come along in the form of a guy or a gal or a knight coming up and chatting with you. It’s also essential to feed the builders who will build your mighty Castle and is used when building a knight unit my liege.
Gold is the daddy, lots of gold means lots of good! Again simple, but effective. You need gold to pay your troops, create your troops, pay spies and diplomats, build castles, forge alliances, effectively complete side-quests, and build things like knights, ballista’s, catapults and siege towers, police the realm and also – keep the people happy!
Iron is again essential for castle building, but also for building infantry, knights and siege weapons like catapults and siege towers. Timber is the same, but used in the creation of Archers and the siege weapons like catapults and siege towers.
Also if you find yourself in abundance of timber say, but no gold, then you can send a merchant to neighbours to trade or dabble in the black market. I never bother, I just find territories that have them and take them.
The erm, useful…inventory and unit bar!
In the screenshot above, you can see 3 sections. Since I’ve already mentioned the resources, I’ll point them out first. They’re the 4 piccies to the right, that look like a loaf of bread, a tree, a pick axe and bars of gold. You need to keep an eye on those, since you’ll need to keep plenty of them to succeed.
The middle pics are of a shield, an arrow and a helmet. The shield is your infantry, the arrow signifies your archers and the helmet shows your knights, again you need to keep plenty of these to hand!
On the right is the task manager I suppose. They are split into Admin, Military and Political. The bottom number shows the total amount of…erm units that can process each task, and the top number shows the amount free. These will go up as you expand.
The admin slot is where you gather your resources and build your castles, the military slot is where you attack or sabotage your enemies, build units or police your realm to prevent spies or saboteurs from damaging you, and the political slot is where you scout, spy, send diplomats, go to the council and increase your peoples happiness. Aww.
As I say though, the idea is to become king. To do this, you need to fight. And fight lots. If not you’re chosen family is gonna die. The fighting takes place on a separate little mini game, although there isn’t a lot to it. If you’re attacking somewhere your units double (except knights) and if you’re defending, your units half – this is good so that if your units all get killed you’ve still got a force to mount a counter attack!
Your little blue guys killed the little red guys! YEAH!!!
In combat you are always blue. The enemy always red. Again simple, but you know where you stand. You take over different territories and kick some bum this way. The screen where you build a castle is also like this, but with no people just a landscape, and your outline of a castle – as I say you could build your own castle or build a template one based on a real castle.
This castle design is based on Harlech Castle.
The points a castle has shows how strong it is. If it’s a strong castle it’ll keep the territories around it feeling safe and they wont revolt and leave you. If it’s a small little castle, then it’ll only keep itself safe from revolt.
Your castle, your strong hold, where you oversee your troops and from where you command your legions. Wanna see it?
You. In all your Kingly Glory.
When a visitor or messenger comes along to give you some news – start a subplot – then you’ll either see the above giant empty throne room or a massive dining hall with you at the head. Then you see your messenger.
Scarface’s great-great great- great- great- great- great- great- great- great- great- great- great- great- great-….you get the idea.
Wow! A real knight in your court, who sounds a bit like John Cleese but isn’t. Apart from when you say to him to send Arinseault a gift, when his voice goes from quite a posh-ish voice, to a more squeaky, squirmy voice when he says “It shall be done.”
These little subplots affect the outcome of the game still though, for example the demagogue Arinseault, with the mob at his beck and call. Depending on what you do, he either goes missing because he’s accused of murder or he comes to see you with his followers. If he comes to see you, he asks you a few questions, to determine if you should be king. If you pass, you get his blessing and some points on your score, if you fail he does not bless you, and you lose points.
There are also subplots involving a dark secret society, sick villagers, a disgruntled ex-Queen, a piece of sacred land and a traveller who claims to know where Atlantis is – to name but a few.
Despite these interesting subplots, the main game is still a difficult bitch to tame. It is still so hard it makes you think it’s been staring at nudey snaps of Des Lynam.
Some of the other parts of the game are very fun as well, such as sending spies, only to find out that your spy has fallen in love with your enemies niece and abandoned you, or when you receive diplomats, who you can improve relations of your neighbours with or kill. And of course the Pope likes nipping in to take you for as much gold as you can give! “The Pope is willing to grant you an indulgence…for 4 gold!” Yeah well stuff off Popey! I’m not Catholic!!
But basically it’s a game where you need to keep your friends close, and you enemies…well dead. You need to make sure you build a fair few castles, and that you keep your people happy. Don’t behead the Popes diplomat, and woo the demagogue, Arinseault. Be tactical, don’t just barge in. Plan your game as much as you can, but most of all, have fun!! This is an old but amazing game that can have you hooked for hours on end much like Civilization II, Football Manager, Mass Effect and Grand Theft Auto. It is a revelation, it is a great starter for the 90’s so far as games go. It’s got actual voice actors telling you things, and a real-time engine that really makes you wonder what is going on with the other barons and counts. Remember that this game is almost 20 years old, but that doesn’t matter! It’s gameplay, in game music (midi music but so catchy and listenable!), it’s storyline and subplots are all absolutely amazing, and make C2S&C one of the best games of the 1990’s. When you think it’s in the same decade as Half-Life, Doom, Sam n Max, Monkey Island, Jedi Knight, Sim City and others like it, you know it must be a great game. Oh by the way, if you do fuck up, and I know you will. You’ll most likely be treated to what is displayed below.
Gulp.
Yes this is the usual ending for C2S&C, a bitter and sorry end for someone who might have been king. I would post a screenshot of the good and happy ending where you’re king…but that would mean waiting for a review for weeks…months…maybe it’ll never happen!
This is definitely worthy of a place in everyone’s game collection, and is such an epic game, that must have played a part in the inspiration for other games after it, that to not play it or dismiss it would be a crying shame!
Rating: 5/5 – a masterpiece of gaming.
Yes this is the usual ending for C2S&C, a bitter and sorry end for someone who might have been king. I would post a screenshot of the good and happy ending where you’re king…but that would mean waiting for a review for weeks…months…maybe it’ll never happen!
This is definitely worthy of a place in everyone’s game collection, and is such an epic game, that must have played a part in the inspiration for other games after it, that to not play it or dismiss it would be a crying shame!
Rating: 5/5 – a masterpiece of gaming.
Friday, 3 September 2010
Castles II: Siege and Conquest Update
Toolbox24
Just a quick update. I'm going to be downloading some free software tonight, to record CII:S&C while I play. I'm not sure if it records the sounds that are taking place on the computer as well - which would be amazing, since this game has a fantastically catchy soundtrack - but I will aim to get some videos online baby!
If this works...then the reviews are gonna get better and better baby.
Just a quick update. I'm going to be downloading some free software tonight, to record CII:S&C while I play. I'm not sure if it records the sounds that are taking place on the computer as well - which would be amazing, since this game has a fantastically catchy soundtrack - but I will aim to get some videos online baby!
If this works...then the reviews are gonna get better and better baby.
Saturday, 28 August 2010
Castles II: Siege and Conquest
Toolbox24
I am desperately trying to find Castles II: Siege and Conquest to write as my next review. Bloody good game, and even though it's 18 years young this year, still harbours happy memories for me and my older brother Mavioni.
I just hope that someone somewhere in a position to do something about it can revamp it in the style that Monkey Island 1+2 have been revamped. Nothing added or taken away from gameplay, just updated graphics and sound if you want it, or old school if you want to keep the memories fresh.
Just watched a video on youtube of it, and am now even more determined to get my game!!! :)
I am desperately trying to find Castles II: Siege and Conquest to write as my next review. Bloody good game, and even though it's 18 years young this year, still harbours happy memories for me and my older brother Mavioni.
I just hope that someone somewhere in a position to do something about it can revamp it in the style that Monkey Island 1+2 have been revamped. Nothing added or taken away from gameplay, just updated graphics and sound if you want it, or old school if you want to keep the memories fresh.
Just watched a video on youtube of it, and am now even more determined to get my game!!! :)
Friday, 30 July 2010
Do kids add anything to online gaming?
Toolbox 24
By kids I mean adolescents. I mean annoying brats. I mean American Kids. I quite often play Red Dead Redemption on the PS3 along with da Monkey, and we often find ourselves in funny, albeit annoying, sparring matches with Yank kids who are – let’s be honest, thick as pig shit.
But don’t get me wrong. It’s not just the Americans. The amount of underage (for certain games) kids we play against on different games from the good ol’ U of K are also thick as pig shit, and lets be perfectly honest – not very good. Occasionally getting 1 kill after I’ve just killed them about 20 times then bragging about how much better than you they are. It’s just pathetic.
Red Dead Redemption, Grand Theft Auto IV (and EFLC), CoD, are all blinding games, but when you get some little punk who thinks he’s Gods Gift to Gaming just because mummy and daddy let him play online for an hour, it ruins it for the men and women who are legally allowed to play the game. They’re rated 18 or 15 for reasons, it’s the graphic content, it’s the language, it’s the themes.
My step-son (11 yrs old) plays the new Call of Duty games, and loves them. Plays them to death. But I find myself in a bind between allowing him to play these games – especially MW2 with it’s now infamous Airport scenario – and not allowing him to play them. The main driver behind him being able to play these games, I’m ashamed to say is almost peer pressure. “But Boy 1 and Boy 2 are playing them, and they always play online.”* – I’m not surprised by this comment, the pair of them are little shits. And I can quite imagine playing MW2 online and shooting the fuck out of the pair of them, or kids like them, because they get right on my tits. As do most kids.
So he is allowed to play them, heck, I played 18 rated games when I was under 18. Sure I did. Not many, because when I was under 18, most games I WANTED to play weren’t 18 rated. X-Wing vs Tie Fighter, Civilization II, Championship Manager (before the Eidos/SI split), etc to name but a few. But he is allowed to play these games, because kids are getting older, quicker. 11 years old can play them, because it’s cool. Like smoking, drinking and having sex. It’s cool. I challenge anyone to not know someone who lost their V-Plates WELL under the age of consent.
But to the point. Do kids add anything to playing online? Yes and no. Yes to the point that they become a common enemy to adults playing online, most people like to teach kids a lesson, and I’m no fucking different. And No. Because they aren’t good enough. They lower the level of play. And they almost never fail to annoy.
HAVING SAID THAT! I’m not one to tar everyone with the same brush. Some kids are actually really good gamers, compared to adults, some kids are genuinely funny. Like this one Canadian lad I once played online, who kept referring to me and my chums as “GOD DAMN WILLY WONKAS!!!”
A line that still has me in stitches. But then, kids aren’t very good…how will they improve for when they are legally old enough to pop a cap in yo virtual ass? I don’t mind my step-son playing CoD. I don’t mind him and his younger brother (8 yrs old) playing Left 4 Dead 1+2 together, or with me or their mum (possible guest writer Carriecakes). Just like me, I used to play FPS when I was growing up, I used to play 3rd Person shooters as well (GTAIII, Dark Forces II: Jedi Knight, Doom etc). But these options were limited online. Jedi Knight I’d play with my mates only, through connecting via IP addys. GTAIII I’d play with my brother in law but it wasn’t online. And Doom I’d play on my own. In the dark. These games and others like it built a generation of gamers.
Kids now, are jumping too quickly from being allowed to simply play the 18 rated games, but play them publicly. Time will tell if it improves them as online gamers, or bores them by the time they’re old enough to be real gamers – able to buy their own games without asking mum or dad. “Online gaming? Nah I did enough of that when I was younger…” possible?
I’ve strayed here and there with the point, but my honest opinion is no, kids generally add little to online play. Games like CoD are mature themed games, which yes are beautifully crafted works of art, and fun as anything to play – but are rated 18 for a reason. But even though they add little to nothing, I think that they should still play, because they are in the vast minority, and those kids that do play online usually play with friends from school. And whenever I come across one in the virtual pastures of RDR or in the post-apocalyptical landscape of L4D, and they give me all the cocky lip that only an unseasoned n00b can give. I’ll blast the little fucker into next maths lesson.
By kids I mean adolescents. I mean annoying brats. I mean American Kids. I quite often play Red Dead Redemption on the PS3 along with da Monkey, and we often find ourselves in funny, albeit annoying, sparring matches with Yank kids who are – let’s be honest, thick as pig shit.
But don’t get me wrong. It’s not just the Americans. The amount of underage (for certain games) kids we play against on different games from the good ol’ U of K are also thick as pig shit, and lets be perfectly honest – not very good. Occasionally getting 1 kill after I’ve just killed them about 20 times then bragging about how much better than you they are. It’s just pathetic.
Red Dead Redemption, Grand Theft Auto IV (and EFLC), CoD, are all blinding games, but when you get some little punk who thinks he’s Gods Gift to Gaming just because mummy and daddy let him play online for an hour, it ruins it for the men and women who are legally allowed to play the game. They’re rated 18 or 15 for reasons, it’s the graphic content, it’s the language, it’s the themes.
My step-son (11 yrs old) plays the new Call of Duty games, and loves them. Plays them to death. But I find myself in a bind between allowing him to play these games – especially MW2 with it’s now infamous Airport scenario – and not allowing him to play them. The main driver behind him being able to play these games, I’m ashamed to say is almost peer pressure. “But Boy 1 and Boy 2 are playing them, and they always play online.”* – I’m not surprised by this comment, the pair of them are little shits. And I can quite imagine playing MW2 online and shooting the fuck out of the pair of them, or kids like them, because they get right on my tits. As do most kids.
So he is allowed to play them, heck, I played 18 rated games when I was under 18. Sure I did. Not many, because when I was under 18, most games I WANTED to play weren’t 18 rated. X-Wing vs Tie Fighter, Civilization II, Championship Manager (before the Eidos/SI split), etc to name but a few. But he is allowed to play these games, because kids are getting older, quicker. 11 years old can play them, because it’s cool. Like smoking, drinking and having sex. It’s cool. I challenge anyone to not know someone who lost their V-Plates WELL under the age of consent.
But to the point. Do kids add anything to playing online? Yes and no. Yes to the point that they become a common enemy to adults playing online, most people like to teach kids a lesson, and I’m no fucking different. And No. Because they aren’t good enough. They lower the level of play. And they almost never fail to annoy.
HAVING SAID THAT! I’m not one to tar everyone with the same brush. Some kids are actually really good gamers, compared to adults, some kids are genuinely funny. Like this one Canadian lad I once played online, who kept referring to me and my chums as “GOD DAMN WILLY WONKAS!!!”
A line that still has me in stitches. But then, kids aren’t very good…how will they improve for when they are legally old enough to pop a cap in yo virtual ass? I don’t mind my step-son playing CoD. I don’t mind him and his younger brother (8 yrs old) playing Left 4 Dead 1+2 together, or with me or their mum (possible guest writer Carriecakes). Just like me, I used to play FPS when I was growing up, I used to play 3rd Person shooters as well (GTAIII, Dark Forces II: Jedi Knight, Doom etc). But these options were limited online. Jedi Knight I’d play with my mates only, through connecting via IP addys. GTAIII I’d play with my brother in law but it wasn’t online. And Doom I’d play on my own. In the dark. These games and others like it built a generation of gamers.
Kids now, are jumping too quickly from being allowed to simply play the 18 rated games, but play them publicly. Time will tell if it improves them as online gamers, or bores them by the time they’re old enough to be real gamers – able to buy their own games without asking mum or dad. “Online gaming? Nah I did enough of that when I was younger…” possible?
I’ve strayed here and there with the point, but my honest opinion is no, kids generally add little to online play. Games like CoD are mature themed games, which yes are beautifully crafted works of art, and fun as anything to play – but are rated 18 for a reason. But even though they add little to nothing, I think that they should still play, because they are in the vast minority, and those kids that do play online usually play with friends from school. And whenever I come across one in the virtual pastures of RDR or in the post-apocalyptical landscape of L4D, and they give me all the cocky lip that only an unseasoned n00b can give. I’ll blast the little fucker into next maths lesson.
Saturday, 24 July 2010
Is pc gaming dead?
Monkeyboysteve
No no it is not, but some developers don't seem to give a crap about PC gaming anymore.
take Ubisoft for example. They make fantastic games, Assassins creed 1 + 2, Splinter cell, and Silenter hunter series as well as other popular titles but add the worst form of DRM ever seen in a game.
I once lost a game of silent hunter 5 where I had been playing for several hours only to be disconnected when my router went the way of the dodo.
I felt cheated by this company, its my damn game if I wanna play it without an Internet connection I will NOT be told otherwise by a company.
I promptly downloaded a crack problem solved, but it shouldn't be this way.
Piracy is just as rife on shitbox 360 but do they have to be online to play ubisoft games? no they don't!
Electronic arts is another offender albeit less serious than Ubisoft, a lot of E.A games are actually great on PC. (Obviously a lot of people hate E.A cause they are the domineering force in the games world and do a lot of things to annoy people but I couldn't care less! they make great games) but there are a few areas that PC gamers get the royal shaft!
I am talking about the sports genre.
Fifa 2010 was amazing on PS3 and shitbox, but on the PC it is closer to the PS2 version. It has none of what made 2010 great on the consoles. E.A stated it was because they were worried some people wouldn't have computers powerful enough to play fifa if it had all the bells and whistles of the console versions.
I'm sorry but most gamers have a rig more powerful than the two consoles anyway, and even if they didn't let us scale down some of the graphics and other options to allow people to play it.
It would be like saying lets make crysis 2 on the PC in the doom engine cause people may not have the computer to run it!
I have gone slightly off topic here but it seems that a lot of developers see PC gaming as the "alternative" platform now because of the consoles, And it does my head in
Rant over
No no it is not, but some developers don't seem to give a crap about PC gaming anymore.
take Ubisoft for example. They make fantastic games, Assassins creed 1 + 2, Splinter cell, and Silenter hunter series as well as other popular titles but add the worst form of DRM ever seen in a game.
I once lost a game of silent hunter 5 where I had been playing for several hours only to be disconnected when my router went the way of the dodo.
I felt cheated by this company, its my damn game if I wanna play it without an Internet connection I will NOT be told otherwise by a company.
I promptly downloaded a crack problem solved, but it shouldn't be this way.
Piracy is just as rife on shitbox 360 but do they have to be online to play ubisoft games? no they don't!
Electronic arts is another offender albeit less serious than Ubisoft, a lot of E.A games are actually great on PC. (Obviously a lot of people hate E.A cause they are the domineering force in the games world and do a lot of things to annoy people but I couldn't care less! they make great games) but there are a few areas that PC gamers get the royal shaft!
I am talking about the sports genre.
Fifa 2010 was amazing on PS3 and shitbox, but on the PC it is closer to the PS2 version. It has none of what made 2010 great on the consoles. E.A stated it was because they were worried some people wouldn't have computers powerful enough to play fifa if it had all the bells and whistles of the console versions.
I'm sorry but most gamers have a rig more powerful than the two consoles anyway, and even if they didn't let us scale down some of the graphics and other options to allow people to play it.
It would be like saying lets make crysis 2 on the PC in the doom engine cause people may not have the computer to run it!
I have gone slightly off topic here but it seems that a lot of developers see PC gaming as the "alternative" platform now because of the consoles, And it does my head in
Rant over
Friday, 23 July 2010
Civilisation II Review
Civilisation II
PC – Turn Based Strategy
Microprose
Toolbox24
The Daddy. Before men spent countless hours of their lives (like I do now) playing Football Manager and guiding their team to glory on all fronts, there was another. . .
Before we spent our precious free time trying to buy a hot little Brazilian who is gonna be the next Kaka for less the £500k, there was something that changed the way we game forever.
In the old days, we played games for fun. For a laugh. To try and get to the next level. The same could be said for almost every game – even the groundbreaking ones.
Wolf3D – Shoot Nazi’s, get to the elevator, next level, repeat until Boss killed.
Super Mario Kart – Drive, throw shells, avoid banana skins, win, repeat.
Command & Conquer – Build a base, train troops, kill enemy, next level, repeat.
FIFA 96 – Whistle blows, kick football, score more than opposition, repeat.
Don’t get me wrong, I spent many hours of my youth playing all of those games with joy and I would happily play them all again today – unless you ask me to try and play the level on Wolf3D with Hitler in it . . . it scares me to this day.
Then came Civilisation II. Now I’m getting ahead of myself. Sid Meier’s Civilisation came first in 1991. However, this is a review of Civilisation II – in my opinion, still the best game in Sid Meier’s Civ series of games – although Civilisation V is out this year, we’ll soon see.
Civilisation II puts you on the world. In 4000BC, as a small nomadic tribe, with the overall task of doing one of 2 things.
Either conquer the entire world or build a spaceship and fly to Alpha Centauri.
PC – Turn Based Strategy
Microprose
Toolbox24
The Daddy. Before men spent countless hours of their lives (like I do now) playing Football Manager and guiding their team to glory on all fronts, there was another. . .
Before we spent our precious free time trying to buy a hot little Brazilian who is gonna be the next Kaka for less the £500k, there was something that changed the way we game forever.
In the old days, we played games for fun. For a laugh. To try and get to the next level. The same could be said for almost every game – even the groundbreaking ones.
Wolf3D – Shoot Nazi’s, get to the elevator, next level, repeat until Boss killed.
Super Mario Kart – Drive, throw shells, avoid banana skins, win, repeat.
Command & Conquer – Build a base, train troops, kill enemy, next level, repeat.
FIFA 96 – Whistle blows, kick football, score more than opposition, repeat.
Don’t get me wrong, I spent many hours of my youth playing all of those games with joy and I would happily play them all again today – unless you ask me to try and play the level on Wolf3D with Hitler in it . . . it scares me to this day.
Then came Civilisation II. Now I’m getting ahead of myself. Sid Meier’s Civilisation came first in 1991. However, this is a review of Civilisation II – in my opinion, still the best game in Sid Meier’s Civ series of games – although Civilisation V is out this year, we’ll soon see.
Civilisation II puts you on the world. In 4000BC, as a small nomadic tribe, with the overall task of doing one of 2 things.
Either conquer the entire world or build a spaceship and fly to Alpha Centauri.
It’s a big new world out there. Someone’s gotta have it…
Now then, Civ II has several different elements to it that are very easy to figure out, and easy to master. You have the main World Map – which is an isometric view of the world you live it. It might be a pre-made map, like the World or Europe or it might be a completely random map with no similarities to our little Earth in any way apart from the grass is green and the sea is blue, and almost every time I play, I gun straight for the French.
To start with the world map is just your little nomad unit, or 2 little nomad units if you’re lucky, a little bit of land and maybe water around you, and of course the fog of war. Even though at the moment, it’s just you. The more you explore however, the more land and water you find, the larger your Civilisation grows.
Your first real job in the game is to establish your Civ in the form of a capital city. All of these cities are pre-set, so for the English – London is your capital, the Germans – Berlin, Russians – Moscow etc.
However you can change the name of your city to anything you want, Fuckersville, Arsemagnetaria, Clungeton to name a few examples of rudery in gaming – which is something we at MonkeyBoxGaming take very fucking seriously. Bitches.
In any case, this is basically a chance for people to relive the last 6000 years and to make it right. The French get crushed before they’ve even heard of that Marie Antoinette bird, the American’s get destroyed and sing God Save the King at the beginning of everyday, and the Chinese don’t even have a Great Wall. No way baby. I built that in Nottingham.
Of course, you don’t have to be forceful and aggressive, that’s just me. You could be very diplomatic. Make love, not war. Befriend the Germans, the Zulus and the Persians, get luvvy duvvy with the Sioux and the Japanese. But exploit them for all they’re worth. Move your nomads around the world, settling in the furthest reaches of the planet, becoming stronger by being clever. And eventually say “Cheerio” to the world as your Civ takes to the stars with as little blood shed as you can possibly have – which the game rewards as much as warfare.
Then there is the City Screen. This micro-management is where the big stuff happens. Yes on the world map, your units can build roads to new cities, or defeat barbarian hordes or decimate the rainforest – but the City Screen is where it’s at. That’s where the cool kids play, that’s where you can win the game.
London as it was about 6000 years ago. Complete with palace and taxes.
In the City Screen you can see a wealth of information, such as what the city is currently building, what units are within the city, what city improvements there are and how happy the population is.
Now population happiness is another key element to the game. If your population are unhappy, they’re gonna riot. If they riot, your city will do nothing. It wont build anything and wont make you money. Also the game rewards happiness as well, and since you want to be remembered as The Great or The Magnificent, and not The Feeble – you’re going to want to make sure your people are happy.
You can do this by building certain improvements, like a Temple, Cathedral or Colosseum. Or by increasing the amount of Luxuries in your Tax screen.
Also in the City Screen you can build Wonders. Earlier, I mentioned having the Great Wall in Nottingham and not – as history and geography will tell you – in China. Well it’s simple. You can. You can have the Pyramids in London, the Statue of Liberty in Moscow or Shakespeare’s Theatre in Bombay.
Each Wonder will also grant your Civ a special attribute or ability to give you an edge over opposing Civs. The Collossus for example gives your city more trade, giving you more money from that city. The Great Library gives you technologies that 2 other Civs have already discovered, giving you a scientific edge and the Great Wall means that in all talks with opposing Civs, they must offer a cease-fire or a peace treaty regardless of what you’ve just done or how they feel about you. These are to name a few, but of course it’s not that simple.
Every time you have your turn, the other Civs are working away, making cities, discovering new technologies and expanding. They too want what you want - to win. And if they can gain an edge through Wonder’s they sure will.
Xena was hairier in Civ II than in the TV show…
Units that you can use in this game vary from age to age, and depending on what technologies you’ve discovered and even to what Wonders of the World you have. If for example you don’t have Leonardo’s Workshop – which upgrades all of your units to its successor as soon as a new tech is discovered – you could have Joe Warrior going into battle being helped along by Stealth Bombers and Nukes.
Of course this is unlikely but possible, but the more techs your Civ discovers, the more advanced your units become. And that is exactly what you want in the battlefield. You want your Marines going into battle against Musketeers and Archers. You want your Cavalry to stampede over your opponents Phalanx. Of course you do, you want the best odds of winning a battle or a war. Who doesn’t??
The small hut of Dublin surrounded by its mystical white wall.
There are also many, many features on the game which make it very replayable. You don’t have to stick with the conventional map of the Earth, you can have a completely random world which is arid or wet, depending on how you set it, or where the land mass is large but made up of archipelagos.
There are also, of course, the different government types, 6 types in all that you can choose as and when you discover them – well I suppose 6 ½ government types, since Anarchy is technically classed as one. It
When you switch government types, your Civ will enter a short period of Anarchy. Unless you have the Statue of Liberty – then you don’t get so much of it. The 6 actual types of governments however are:
• Despotism – Which offers little in the way of any benefits. But it is the default government at the beginning of the game. It does the job at the start when your Civ is small, but becomes less useful the further in the game you get, and the bigger your Civ grows.
• Monarchy – Much the same as Despotism – however the richer echelons in society have more freedom, so you’re a smidge more productive.
• Fundamentalism – Under Fundamentalism, there is one major benefit. Nobody is ever unhappy! However you produce half the science of any other government – making this a very hard government type to get far in the game.
• Communism – Personally my favourite government type in the game (just as a disclaimer, this has no bearing on my ACTUAL thoughts on Communism). The major benefits I find is that you get absolutely no corruption in Communism, doesn’t matter how big your Civ grows, Corruption and therefore productivity never faulters. Also in my experience, because the land is shared by the people, there isn’t as much unhappiness. And lastly you don’t ever get the Senate bothering you to stop doing something, or signing peace treaties behind your back!!
• Republic – What a bother. If you want to advance militarily in the game, don’t even think about having a Republic. The more units you have not in Friendly cities or Fortresses – makes more unhappy citizens, which halts productivity. Also during a successful war, your senate might force a peaceful solution! Bastards!!! I want to destroy those Persians! Not become “friends”! Urgh. Also if you want any remote chance of keeping the people happy – you’ll have to lower how much money you spend on Science, and put it into Luxuries.
• Democracy – Much the same as Republic. However in a Democracy instead of 1 unhappy citizen per unit not in a friendly zone, you get 2 unhappy citizens per unit not in a friendly zone. Double the unhappiness!! Double Wank! Now the benefit is that your units and cities are immune to bribery – which is great! No spies or diplomats can convert your cities away from your Civ! Which is great if you again didn’t have the senate there forcing peace treaties. The other benefit is like Communism – no corruption or waste! Much higher productivity. If it wasn’t for the major downsides to Democracy (again, IN GAME not real life opinions) I would pick it more over Communism.
Then there is science. Technology upgrades, techonology trees which branch off and let you discover more technologies. Technologies which need to be discovered along with other technologies to create newer Military Units, build new Wonders of the World and of course – discover even newer technologies.
For example to discover Refrigeration, you wouldn’t have though that you’d need to know about Pottery or Metallurgy would you? However without those techs, helping to lead you onto sanitation and electricity you can’t get Refrigeration.
Ahh yes, Pottery – that key element to buying a fridge.
There is a simplicity about this game which for me puts it head and shoulders above the newer Civs in the series. This simplicity makes it easy to learn, master and play. I recently tried Civ IV for the first time the other day. After completing the tutorial I felt that the game would be more hard work than play but I’m sure after putting the hours in it would be just as fun.
Learning the tricks and tactics of Civ II is a joy which makes this game one that can stand the test of time, in years to come after the last Civ game has been published, I’m sure people will look back on the series and say the same thing – Civ II conquered all. It really would take something special to knock it off it’s pedestal.
This is a game of epic proportions. You must nurture and cradle your Civ until it’s big enough and bold enough to seek out new lands and kick some serious arse if need be. You must be clever, cunning, ruthless and domestic all at the same time. You need to think tactically, aggressively and patiently. You need to destroy the French.
This game is amazing, after so many years it still grips me to my chair to sit and play it until stupid o’clock in the morning because I just want to get that advance, or build that Wonder. This game for me, will always be there, no matter how many new Civs Sid Meier churns out every couple of years, this Civ will remain top of the class.
Quick Summary: A fantastic Turn Based Strategy for the PC where you start life with a nomad and can end it with a space trip to Alpha Centauri. Addictive, fun, easy to master, epic. Quite simply one of the best games of all time.
Rating: 5/5 - Epic Gaming.
To start with the world map is just your little nomad unit, or 2 little nomad units if you’re lucky, a little bit of land and maybe water around you, and of course the fog of war. Even though at the moment, it’s just you. The more you explore however, the more land and water you find, the larger your Civilisation grows.
Your first real job in the game is to establish your Civ in the form of a capital city. All of these cities are pre-set, so for the English – London is your capital, the Germans – Berlin, Russians – Moscow etc.
However you can change the name of your city to anything you want, Fuckersville, Arsemagnetaria, Clungeton to name a few examples of rudery in gaming – which is something we at MonkeyBoxGaming take very fucking seriously. Bitches.
In any case, this is basically a chance for people to relive the last 6000 years and to make it right. The French get crushed before they’ve even heard of that Marie Antoinette bird, the American’s get destroyed and sing God Save the King at the beginning of everyday, and the Chinese don’t even have a Great Wall. No way baby. I built that in Nottingham.
Of course, you don’t have to be forceful and aggressive, that’s just me. You could be very diplomatic. Make love, not war. Befriend the Germans, the Zulus and the Persians, get luvvy duvvy with the Sioux and the Japanese. But exploit them for all they’re worth. Move your nomads around the world, settling in the furthest reaches of the planet, becoming stronger by being clever. And eventually say “Cheerio” to the world as your Civ takes to the stars with as little blood shed as you can possibly have – which the game rewards as much as warfare.
Then there is the City Screen. This micro-management is where the big stuff happens. Yes on the world map, your units can build roads to new cities, or defeat barbarian hordes or decimate the rainforest – but the City Screen is where it’s at. That’s where the cool kids play, that’s where you can win the game.
London as it was about 6000 years ago. Complete with palace and taxes.
In the City Screen you can see a wealth of information, such as what the city is currently building, what units are within the city, what city improvements there are and how happy the population is.
Now population happiness is another key element to the game. If your population are unhappy, they’re gonna riot. If they riot, your city will do nothing. It wont build anything and wont make you money. Also the game rewards happiness as well, and since you want to be remembered as The Great or The Magnificent, and not The Feeble – you’re going to want to make sure your people are happy.
You can do this by building certain improvements, like a Temple, Cathedral or Colosseum. Or by increasing the amount of Luxuries in your Tax screen.
Also in the City Screen you can build Wonders. Earlier, I mentioned having the Great Wall in Nottingham and not – as history and geography will tell you – in China. Well it’s simple. You can. You can have the Pyramids in London, the Statue of Liberty in Moscow or Shakespeare’s Theatre in Bombay.
Each Wonder will also grant your Civ a special attribute or ability to give you an edge over opposing Civs. The Collossus for example gives your city more trade, giving you more money from that city. The Great Library gives you technologies that 2 other Civs have already discovered, giving you a scientific edge and the Great Wall means that in all talks with opposing Civs, they must offer a cease-fire or a peace treaty regardless of what you’ve just done or how they feel about you. These are to name a few, but of course it’s not that simple.
Every time you have your turn, the other Civs are working away, making cities, discovering new technologies and expanding. They too want what you want - to win. And if they can gain an edge through Wonder’s they sure will.
Xena was hairier in Civ II than in the TV show…
Units that you can use in this game vary from age to age, and depending on what technologies you’ve discovered and even to what Wonders of the World you have. If for example you don’t have Leonardo’s Workshop – which upgrades all of your units to its successor as soon as a new tech is discovered – you could have Joe Warrior going into battle being helped along by Stealth Bombers and Nukes.
Of course this is unlikely but possible, but the more techs your Civ discovers, the more advanced your units become. And that is exactly what you want in the battlefield. You want your Marines going into battle against Musketeers and Archers. You want your Cavalry to stampede over your opponents Phalanx. Of course you do, you want the best odds of winning a battle or a war. Who doesn’t??
The small hut of Dublin surrounded by its mystical white wall.
There are also many, many features on the game which make it very replayable. You don’t have to stick with the conventional map of the Earth, you can have a completely random world which is arid or wet, depending on how you set it, or where the land mass is large but made up of archipelagos.
There are also, of course, the different government types, 6 types in all that you can choose as and when you discover them – well I suppose 6 ½ government types, since Anarchy is technically classed as one. It
When you switch government types, your Civ will enter a short period of Anarchy. Unless you have the Statue of Liberty – then you don’t get so much of it. The 6 actual types of governments however are:
• Despotism – Which offers little in the way of any benefits. But it is the default government at the beginning of the game. It does the job at the start when your Civ is small, but becomes less useful the further in the game you get, and the bigger your Civ grows.
• Monarchy – Much the same as Despotism – however the richer echelons in society have more freedom, so you’re a smidge more productive.
• Fundamentalism – Under Fundamentalism, there is one major benefit. Nobody is ever unhappy! However you produce half the science of any other government – making this a very hard government type to get far in the game.
• Communism – Personally my favourite government type in the game (just as a disclaimer, this has no bearing on my ACTUAL thoughts on Communism). The major benefits I find is that you get absolutely no corruption in Communism, doesn’t matter how big your Civ grows, Corruption and therefore productivity never faulters. Also in my experience, because the land is shared by the people, there isn’t as much unhappiness. And lastly you don’t ever get the Senate bothering you to stop doing something, or signing peace treaties behind your back!!
• Republic – What a bother. If you want to advance militarily in the game, don’t even think about having a Republic. The more units you have not in Friendly cities or Fortresses – makes more unhappy citizens, which halts productivity. Also during a successful war, your senate might force a peaceful solution! Bastards!!! I want to destroy those Persians! Not become “friends”! Urgh. Also if you want any remote chance of keeping the people happy – you’ll have to lower how much money you spend on Science, and put it into Luxuries.
• Democracy – Much the same as Republic. However in a Democracy instead of 1 unhappy citizen per unit not in a friendly zone, you get 2 unhappy citizens per unit not in a friendly zone. Double the unhappiness!! Double Wank! Now the benefit is that your units and cities are immune to bribery – which is great! No spies or diplomats can convert your cities away from your Civ! Which is great if you again didn’t have the senate there forcing peace treaties. The other benefit is like Communism – no corruption or waste! Much higher productivity. If it wasn’t for the major downsides to Democracy (again, IN GAME not real life opinions) I would pick it more over Communism.
Then there is science. Technology upgrades, techonology trees which branch off and let you discover more technologies. Technologies which need to be discovered along with other technologies to create newer Military Units, build new Wonders of the World and of course – discover even newer technologies.
For example to discover Refrigeration, you wouldn’t have though that you’d need to know about Pottery or Metallurgy would you? However without those techs, helping to lead you onto sanitation and electricity you can’t get Refrigeration.
Ahh yes, Pottery – that key element to buying a fridge.
There is a simplicity about this game which for me puts it head and shoulders above the newer Civs in the series. This simplicity makes it easy to learn, master and play. I recently tried Civ IV for the first time the other day. After completing the tutorial I felt that the game would be more hard work than play but I’m sure after putting the hours in it would be just as fun.
Learning the tricks and tactics of Civ II is a joy which makes this game one that can stand the test of time, in years to come after the last Civ game has been published, I’m sure people will look back on the series and say the same thing – Civ II conquered all. It really would take something special to knock it off it’s pedestal.
This is a game of epic proportions. You must nurture and cradle your Civ until it’s big enough and bold enough to seek out new lands and kick some serious arse if need be. You must be clever, cunning, ruthless and domestic all at the same time. You need to think tactically, aggressively and patiently. You need to destroy the French.
This game is amazing, after so many years it still grips me to my chair to sit and play it until stupid o’clock in the morning because I just want to get that advance, or build that Wonder. This game for me, will always be there, no matter how many new Civs Sid Meier churns out every couple of years, this Civ will remain top of the class.
Quick Summary: A fantastic Turn Based Strategy for the PC where you start life with a nomad and can end it with a space trip to Alpha Centauri. Addictive, fun, easy to master, epic. Quite simply one of the best games of all time.
Rating: 5/5 - Epic Gaming.
Wednesday, 21 July 2010
Welcome to MonkeyBoxGaming
MonkeyBoxGaming - Where games go to be loved up and down.
It is the love child of Toolbox24 and Monkeyboysteve.
I am Toolbox24. I have 4 kids, work full time. But love games. Oh how I love them. Love them dearly.
And I am Monkeyboysteve, I have no life dont work very much but play computer games constantly! Games are a massive part of my life and almost as good as sex!
And we hope to share that love with anybody who will read this blog. I'm sure that eventually Monkeyboysteve will post something as well so that he can tell the world how much he loves games too.
Quick intro for now, but more will come. We wont just review new games, but older games that might be a bit out of circulation or games that might be a bit forgotten or just games that you might not have heard of.
I hope that you enjoy this blog. we know we will.
Toolbox24 + Monkeyboysteve
-PS--We will try to post links to gaming news stories that WE think are important, relevant or exciting as well! Also when it comes to reviewing games, we will be trying to review as many games as we can, but generally - I'll only be reviewing games that I like, and I think others will like. I don't see the point of reviewing a game that i think is chaff!!!
It is the love child of Toolbox24 and Monkeyboysteve.
I am Toolbox24. I have 4 kids, work full time. But love games. Oh how I love them. Love them dearly.
And I am Monkeyboysteve, I have no life dont work very much but play computer games constantly! Games are a massive part of my life and almost as good as sex!
And we hope to share that love with anybody who will read this blog. I'm sure that eventually Monkeyboysteve will post something as well so that he can tell the world how much he loves games too.
Quick intro for now, but more will come. We wont just review new games, but older games that might be a bit out of circulation or games that might be a bit forgotten or just games that you might not have heard of.
I hope that you enjoy this blog. we know we will.
Toolbox24 + Monkeyboysteve
-PS--We will try to post links to gaming news stories that WE think are important, relevant or exciting as well! Also when it comes to reviewing games, we will be trying to review as many games as we can, but generally - I'll only be reviewing games that I like, and I think others will like. I don't see the point of reviewing a game that i think is chaff!!!
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